I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Randomize
