I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
