this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
