You made me cry and you don't even care
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
