If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
