member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
