just come out here and I will go home with you...
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
