ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Randomize