He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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