I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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