I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I need water and some morals
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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