Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize