i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
