five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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