We won't sleep together?
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
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we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
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Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
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