i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I came so hard my ears popped.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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