No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize