I wanna passion pit in your ass
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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