so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
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Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
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Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
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