Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
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