After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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