We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize