I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
