Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize