i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Randomize
