weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
