How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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