He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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