I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
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I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
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I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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