I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
People in love make me want to vomit
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize