He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Randomize
