i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize