we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
