We're facebook friends in real life
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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