We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
