Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize