Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
