I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
