What did we do last night that was yellow?
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
