She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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