I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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