I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
