But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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