the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
