i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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