Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
