I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
He passed out mid-signature
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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