he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
