i wish there were pregnant emoticons
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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