how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today